No Greater Joy - Volume 1

Author: Michael & Debi Pearl

Audience: Parents

Rating: Excellent

This book or set of tapes is very helpful concerning principles for training children. The principles are not presented in a systematic way but rather as responses to real people's questions and with real family situations as examples. The authors go beyond training a child's outward behavior to training the inner person, especially to deal with the rebellious nature. The goal is to gain the child's heart. Another strong point of the book is showing how many common notions about child training actually train the children to do exactly the opposite of what the parents want.

One of the key basic principles taught in the book is that it matters more who the parents are than what they teach their children. In their words, "More is caught than taught". In other words, the children learn much more from their parents examples than from what their parents tell them. So the book is also very helpful regarding family relationships in general.

There are some things to keep in mind when reading this book or listening to the tapes:

1. Even though the authors are Christians and frequently use Bible verses to support points that they are making, they do not have a clear vision of God's economy. Their teachings are very practical and insightful about what husbands and wives, fathers and mothers should be. If we don't see our own shortcomings clearly, we will blame our spouse or our children for family problems. Hopefully, a book like this gives the Lord a way to enlighten us concerning our own shortcomings. But a key shortage of the book is that it leads toward trying to change rather than repentance to the Lord and turning to Him to give Him the way to change us. Not, "I will change", nor even, "Lord, change me", but rather, "Lord, forgive me. Cleanse me with Your blood. Fill me with Your Spirit. Live Yourself through me." In other words, it is not what I can do even with the Lord's help, it is a matter of turning to the spirit so that the Lord can live in me. Nevertheless, without some of the kinds of practical wisdom concerning training children that this book teaches, I may be in spirit, yet still fail to raise up my children to love and serve the Lord.
2. The book frequently mentions using a "switch". In Canada parents are restricted by law concerning their discipline of their children. As we understand it, according to Canadian law, parents are allowed to spank their children with the following restrictions:
   1. Never spank a child less than 2 or more than 12 years of age.
   2. Never use an instrument to hit a child. Only use your hand.
   3. Never hit a child on the head.
   So we recommend this book because of the principles it teaches concerning child training. We are not promoting or condoning discipline which would be considered child abuse by the law of the land.
3. The authors assume their audience consists of parents who are home schooling their children and are very negative toward any kind of classroom schooling. We do not share their views concerning schooling without reservations. To us, the real value of the book or tapes is in some of the answers to parents' questions later on. We suggest skipping over the first part initially and starting with the last tape and working backwards.